I was blessed to be able to attend the Glory in the Highest Tour this past weekend with Chris Tomlin & Louis Giglio. WOW! It was an incredible worship experience where God spoke to me in a BIG way. Oh, how I love to hear Him speaking to me. His words are so soft and tender, yet so powerful! On this night, His words to me were, “Accept the chaos.” These weren’t exactly the words I wanted to hear; my flesh was fighting hard against them. You see, my flesh is highly perfectionistic and controlling, so chaos is the enemy. How could I embrace this “enemy”? When things in my life are chaotic, spinning out of control, I feel VERY insecure & anxious. So, I try to contol things, make them just right, extinguish any choas in order to give myself a sense of calm, peace, and security. Whoa…now that’s just the kind of self-reliance & self-dependence that God wants to weed out of our lives.
As my struggle gave way to surrender, I repeated through tears, “God, okay, I’ll accept the choas…I’ll accept the chaos.” I began to hear the truth…I’m okay inside the chaos because God is right there with me. He is my calm, my peace, and my security. I don’t have to fight against the chaos to get it under control. He has everything under control. I can depend on Him and rest.
This is Christmas: Jesus, Emmanuel, God with us, has come into my chaos/my mess and given me Himself–His fullness, His sufficiency, His salvation, His peace.